Sunday, January 21, 2007

Magical Mondays: A Grandfather's Gifts

(Posting on Sunday due to time constraints)

I had originally planned to blog about a different topic for this Monday, but something happened Friday that changed my mind.

This may ramble a bit, but please bear with me as I try to keep to the timeline of important events here. :) Some of you may recognize this because I talked about it in someone else's blog, but now there's more.

Some background: My parents divorced when I was six and I only saw my father a handful of times after that up until age 11, then he disappeared from our lives. My paternal grandfather, too, disappeared after the divorce until I was about 15. He just showed up on our doorstep one day--he'd hired someone to find us--and said he didn't care what his son or my mother said, he wasn't going to go on cutting his grandkids out of his life. Apparently, our dad told him our mom didn't want him coming around, and told our mom his father didn't want to see us, thus the breach.

Over the years, he kept in touch and my brother even lived with him for a years. About six years ago I visited him and found out that he'd written 21 books over the years; something I didn't know and was pleased to discover. He had self-published, and he autographed a copy of one his books for me--it's one of my treasures--and said I could edit his next book.

Go forward to around May of the following year: I had a feeling I was forgetting something important that was due to happen on July 18th. My daughter's birthday is the 14th, so I knew that wasn't it. I thought maybe I'd forgotten a friend's birthday, so I called her to verify the date; she said no, not until October 18. Perturbed, I searched the house for clues as to what I was forgetting and found nothing. Nevertheless, I circled the date on all my calendars at work and home. It wasn't until I bolted out of bed on the morning of the 19th that I realized what day it was: my grandfather had died the day before, and I'd circled the date two months before it happened.

A couple of weeks later, I was sitting in the living room thinking about two men that I had been semi-dating at the time and wondering if I ought to continue, pick one, or drop both when I heard my grandfather's voice in the room loud and clear, saying, "Ain't neither one of 'ems worth a shit!" It shook me pretty badly because it sounded as if he were in the room right next to me. Not long afterward, I found out he was exactly right--they weren't. :)

Fast-forward to this past week and bear in mind that the first and last time I've seen my father in the past 30+ years was at my granddad's funeral five years ago.

Thursday night, I was remembering some pictures taken at my grandparent's house 14 years ago, but that had gotten lost over the years. I had seen one when I went to get my things in Arizona and thought I had brought it home with me, but searched and couldn't find it. It was the last one I had. I wished there were some way I could get copies of all of them, especially digital ones, but knew there was no way. No one else had any, and they weren't taken with a digital camera, so I was out of luck. It made me really sad.

The next day, I got an email from my dad. It said, "We were going through some old pictures today and came across these from your Grandpa." Attached were all the photos I thought were gone forever.

He's still looking out for me.


  1. Nice thought.

    I think we need ties to our past. Parents and grandparents offer those ties, even if only through memories. Then there are friends who have known us over the years, and who keep alive through memory certain facets of who we are.


  2. Kate, what a lovely story! You are definitely connected. The most recent experience for me was when my dad died. I was very fortunate to be with my parents at their passing last year. It's a gift, difficult but very spiritual. I was worried he was in pain, and I was talking to him. Basic things asking him if he was comfortable, etc. Clear as a bell, I heard his voice in my head. He said, "don't worry about me, honey, I'm okay." I can't tell you the peace that came over me. I spoke to him then, mind to mind. Told him things I wanted him to hear. I know he heard me too. I've had dreams since then, when he visits me. Other stories I'll share on Magical Mondays. What a great venue, Kate. Ya know, living is all about the loving. Bank accounts, success, material things disappear at that one moment. Makes you humble, keeps you real.

  3. Stewart, there are some things about me I wish my friends would stop reminding me of! :)

    LaDonna, I'm glad you found peace with your parents' passing, and still share with your dad. I look forward to hearing more of your stories.

    Jon Zech wrote a lovely bit of a story on his blog about a visit after death.

  4. Kate, your story and LaDonna's are both lovely and give me a good feeling inside. Lately I've been thinking of someone, and then I'll get an email from her or him. Nothing as dramatic as yours though. :)

  5. Edie, I read a book some time ago that I think you would like by Sinclair Browning. It was called
    "Feathers Brush My Heart:
    True Stories of Mothers
    Touching Their Daughters'
    Lives After Death."

    My original blog was to be about intuition (I guess that'll be next Monday!) so you're experiences of thinking about someone and having them show up would fit in. (Though it could also be called "synchronicity") :)

  6. What a great story, Kate. You are so fortunate to have that connection.

    I remember after my father died ... geez, it's been over six years now ... same thing, I was thinking of him, wishing he was still here to meet my daughter. That night I had such a vivid dream. Don't even remember what the dream was but it was completely unconnected to my dad. All of a sudden he walked into my dream, sorta smiled at me, gave me a little wave and walked away. I knew then that everything was okay with him. He was happy and at peace. As a result, so was I.

  7. Wow, Liz, another one. I often imagine my mother and my sister sending me blessings and love from the after-life. Don't know if that's happening, but it gives me a feeling that all will be well.

  8. Liz, your story reminded me of a girlfriend's dream. Her dad passed away years ago. Not too long after, she dreamed of him standing by this signpost. It was misspelled. LOL. I don't remember what the word was now, but she knew it was him because he could never spell right! She knew he made it to the other side!

  9. What wonderful stories. My husband and I were talking about a friend we hadn't spoken of in ages once, and later we found out he died in a plane crash that day. I like to think his spirit was saying farewell to all his friends.

    I firmly believe my daughter and I have some kind of telepathic connection. She's only 4, and I was reading her the story of Samson and Delilah from her children's bible she got from her grandfather for Christmas. It said that Samson's enemies hurt his eyes so he couldn't see, and she wanted to know what they did to his eyes. I thought to myself, hot poker but I can't tell her that, and she says, I know, I think they put something very hot on his eyes and burned them. This is not the first time this has happened by a long shot. It works the other way too. Unfortunately for her, LOL.

  10. Liz, I'm glad you had that opportunity to experience peace with your father's passing.

    Edie, I have no doubt that they are. :)

    LaDonna that's so funny--thanks for sharing!

    Michelle, I can relate to the mother/daughter bond too. Emily hates it when I comment on something that she was just thinking--I think she's afraid I'm always reading her mind! LOL Now, if she didn't have anything to hide, it wouldn't be a problem... :)


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